Putting Feelings Into Words!

This Chapter just like all the others is a `First Draft` before I re-write my thoughts as a Word Document for inclusion in the book version.

The fact is I have to get my story on-the-record as without sounding like a `Drama Queen` I know my days are `numbered`.

Situations and things people say get me thinking about my past life and future death. The pretty girl in the hairdressers made me think of the memories I`ll leave behind for my children...and my recent stay in Southend Hospital reminded me of how much I dont like `old people`.

Like fat women what is the reason for there excistence?

I was the youngest in my Ward...the others were all old...looked old...and moaned non-stop. They complained to each other about the `foreign` nurses...but were `friendly` to there faces.

They made being two-faced into a art form...I got on great with all the nurses...black and white...the young ones I sort of `flirted` with in a `friendly way`...and enjoyed the older nurses `mothering me`...even though I was older then most of them...LOL.

I aint being a hypocrite cos I `hate` the militant muslims of East London as much as the next decent person...who are without doubt the scum of the earth...burning poppies and slagging our soldiers as they strut around in flowing `dresses`.

But as I tell my kids its a `Class Thing` and not `race hate`...the Asian nurses who looked after me...like the muslim consultant who carried out my operation are Middle Class and nothing like the low-life terrorist supporting traitors from dustbins like Forest Gate or shit-holes like inner-city Bradford.

Just as we (decent white people) have no connection to foul-mouthed white chavs on benefits who smoke weed, drink cheap booze and watch Eastenders...professional and medical muslims are different to the `white hating benefit scrounging` followers of  militant islam.

The point of the story is that the `racist old gits` in the ward were an embarrassment...I am proud to say I 100% hate the Royal Family, the police, paedophiles and Tony Blair...but with muslims...its only the militants who hate me that I hate...but the old boys in my Ward didnt have the brains or interlect to seperate `vile evil muslims` from the rest.

I am not anti-muslim:

Example 1. I think Ali G is "hilarious"

Example 2. There is a Asian/Indian/Muslim girl who works in the Basildon Branch of the Halifax...and she looks like a Supermodel

Example 3. I am `sort of mates` with a muslim bloke...he owns the Dry Cleaners opposite Laindon Station and I`m in there 2 or 3 times a week.
The guy is Thirty, French and a `westernised muslim`...and you couldnt meet a nicer fella.

Sam knew him first...but now I go in and chat to him for about a hour at a time when I pick up the dry cleaning.
He is obsessed with Page 3 girls, lap dancers and showbiz...he did like Simon Cowell untill I told him The X Factor `queen` was `bent as a nine bob`.

Now every time I go in - he says in a `broken English` accent - "Simon Cowell he is a homosexual" - he`s told all his mates in London and says things like "The more I see him on TV and in the papers I can tell he is a homosexual".

The bloke is hilarious - loves all my jokes - so I really like him - LOL.
He loved my joke about Simon Cowell`s favourite football team being Young Boys of Switzerland...and the guy is so funny chatting up all the housewives and City girls when they pick-up or drop off their dry cleaning...but the fact is `bigots` like the old geezers in Southend Hospital havent got the intelligence to seperate a `good guy` like him from the suicide bombers who infest our inner-cities.

For-the-record...as some people misunderstand what I write...there is nothing wrong in Simon Cowell being `gay`...but what I hate is the fact he denies it...even though everyone in the media knows he `bats for the other side`.
One day as with Sir Cliff Richard and Gary Speed...the truth will come out...it always does...for proof...look no further then vile paedophile Jimmy Saville.

I am a people person...and never been anti-anyone on the `grounds` of race, religion or sexual bias.

My all-time hero David Bowie `bisexual`...my favourite gangsters Reg and Ronnie Kray "gay"...I love comics like Alan Carr...think Stephen Fry is a genuis...and fancy lesbian Lindsay Lohan (in her blonde prison mug shot)...but the difference with them and Mr Cowell...is that they were all honest...whereas Simon Cowell is a closet queen who should `outed`...and stop pretending to be a `bird bandit`.

Passing on my view/beliefs to my children has not been easy...they like me are PROUD of being Working Class but hate low-life chavs...at first it was hard explaining the difference between genuine working class culture and the underclass.

Likewise it was hard explaining how as I`ve NEVER worked in my life...never had a proper job...that I describe myself as "working class".
Even more confusing was my `love` of Mrs Thatcher...not the Tory Party...but I loved the fact she was a `strong woman` who took on the `snobs`.

I aint a Saint...but I have got a `touch of class` about me...and have `loyalty, fair play and decency` in my DNA...as do my children.

My take on life...is I admit not `normal`...I hate druggies who smoke weed or take heroin...but I`m a lifelong supporter of `fast drugs` like speed, coke and E.

I hate low-life petty criminals...but love proper gangsters...but even then I`m pretty selective...I know that The Richardsons were more successful and made much more money then The Krays...but I idolised Reg and Ron because of the showbiz connection.

Likewise I think Dave Courtney is the `top man` of his generation...because of his involvement in the World of Entertainment.

I hope I`ve passed on all of the above `standards` to my children. Both my boys have morals and believe that loyalty is a virtue.

They have great taste in Music, Television, Only Fools And Horses, The Office, The Inbetweeners and we all like the same funnymen - comics like Frankie Boyle, Ricky Gervais, Jimmy Carr, John Bishop, Micky Flannagan, Lee Mack and Kevin Bishop...but they are not clones of me as they also like comedians I cant stand.
Sam for some reason likes Russell Howard - the loonie leftie with a dodgy eye...the sweaty Lee Evans...and Peter Kay.
Adam finds posh boy Jack Whitehall funny.

But we all agree that Michael McIntyre is a "unfunny wanker".

Now my daughter I`ve learned likes The Only Way Is Essex...but she will grow out of that...as did both boys...though they still like Mark Wright.

I do wonder about her taste in music...though for obvious reasons...I hope she dont like JLS or have pictures of them on her bedroom wall.

Sam reckons she`ll be into Beiber...but does she still like The Simpsons?